I want to talk about when life is going wrong, you’re not where you want to be and coming to a place of acceptance for where you are at.
It’s safe to say that I certainly don’t want to be where I’m at right now! Recovering from a horrific health relapse that has stolen 2 and a half years of my life, still living at home at the age of 30, very single and with no achievements to my name. I long for what everyone else has; a relationship, a home of my own, a career, a baby, just some freedom would be nice! I’ve battled greatly at not being able to have these things and not knowing if my illness will ever allow me to have them. For a long time I’ve been beaten by the emotions that overwhelm me over what my illness stops me from having, but with a lot of self work I am now beating them and am living from a happier place.
Many people live a life they are not happy with. Many people go through hardship. Life is tough! When you are in a situation you don’t want to be in you can either let it beat you, change it or accept it. When it’s beating you life feels impossible. In changing it comes challenges but rewarding outcomes. If you can’t change it then the hardest but best thing to be done is to accept it with all your inner strength and come to terms with where life has lead you thus far. With acceptance comes peace, relief from the fraught inner emotional battles and renewed energy in the tank to enjoy life from where you are at.
It’s taken me a long time to accept that my life is as it is and I can’t do anything to change it. But what I can do is change my outlook on it. I can change the way I see my life, my self and my future. I can hope, I can learn and I can be in a place of acceptance and positivity. I don’t allow my circumstances to define me anymore. I am myself, I just have an illness.
I find gratitude in every little thing I can do and every positive thing I have in life. I look for what my life circumstances can teach me and I learn what I can from where I’m at. Each time I hit a down patch I try and allow it to make me that much stronger than I was before it reared it’s ugly head.
When you change your outlook from ‘I wish my life was like this’ to ‘Ok this is where I’m at, time to accept it’, life does become easier. You are no longer using all your energy on wishing for what you don’t have and you can focus that energy instead on enjoying life from where you are at and creating ways in which you can make changes to your situation, if that is possible. Your mind becomes free-er and more relaxed without the inner conflict of wishing things were different. Acceptance makes you stronger and more level-headed to deal with what life is throwing at you. The battleships blowing cannons at your life feel easier to deal with when you are in this state of mind.
I think one of the biggest thieves of joy is comparison. It’s taken me a freakin long time to realise this I tell you! One of the worst things is to compare your life to everyone else’s. You may be comparing your life to another’s and wishing you had what they had, but there may be someone looking at your life and wishing they had what you have. There will always be someone better off than you and there will always be someone worse off than you. Take life at YOUR pace. Let go of comparing your life to other people’s. Life will become happier when you are focused on your journey and no one else’s. Let go of where you think your life should be at, accept things as they are and dont compare your life to everyone else’s. Things are often never as they may seem from the outside and you never know what battles other people are secretly fighting.
I want 2019 to be a year of acceptance for where I’m at, positivity that life will be good with this illness in toe instead of hampered, hope that things can and will continue to get better, and full to the brim of so many happy times!
I’m learning there is no rush! Life is not a competitive race to collect everything on the list of adulthood before everyone else. There is plenty of time. Be happy for those that have what you don’t have and enjoy it with them. Have the strength to support those going through hard times, they will need their friends. And squeeze every bit of happiness from the good times!
All my love,